Our daughters are hungry
Our sons are starving
Our babies are sick
Our husbands are angry
The land is bleeding
The air we breathe is bitter
Everywhere around us, there is despair
Sadness settles on young and old like a heavy, dusty cloak
Sheba sees it in the eyes of Halima her neighbour
who struggles to feed her three children
Halima’s angry husband dropped dead from a heart attack
Sheba had a husband once
But he left to look for work in another town
Well, that is what he told her
She has heard about him – he has another wife and three children
She has not heard from him – not even to ask about the two children he left behind
Sheba does not have a husband
She has her children
She also has her ‘Akara’ which she fries to keep her children fed, in school and a roof over their heads
Sheba sees the drooped shoulders of Ngozi
Who sells vegetables next to her in the market
Every day Ngozi hopes she will make enough to cook a decent meal
So that her hungry daughter will eat
Her starving son will sleep with his belly at least half full
Her sick baby will feel better
And her angry husband will be too tired to raise his fists to her
Sheba sees the anxious look of Bode, the mechanic across the road
He used to be angry
Now he is simply weary
There are hardly any cars to fix anymore
He stopped pricing his services a while ago
He simply tells his customers, ‘Give me what you have’
Then, he will be able to go home and meet his wife’s wary look
Bukky is wary because she does not know what to expect from her weary husband
Sheba watches the hesitant footsteps of Lillian as she passes by
With a vacant look on her face
Sheba is worried about Lillian
She has been like this for a while
Ever since her daughter died giving birth
Her useless son in law did not have enough money to take care of her daughter
Yet, he had enough to marry someone else six months later
God was kind, the baby lived
Yet poor Lillian, who can hardly feed herself
Now has a baby to care for
Okafor her husband should not be going to the farm with his bad leg
He goes anyway
Otherwise, they will starve, be angry or sick
One night Sheba had a dream
She dreamt that she called Halima, Ngozi, Lillian and Bukky to a meeting
In the dream, she said to them, ‘We need to help ourselves. No one is going to help us. No one is here to save us. We should not be hungry. We should not be sick. Our children should not be hopeless. We should not die before our time. I have a little money. Let us do something productive so that we can all benefit. Let us help each other. We have no one else’
It was such a nice dream. There were no arguments, there was no hissing and shouting
They all agreed to help each other
They all had ideas on what they could do
That way they could feed their children
And not have to send their daughters away to work as maids or much worse
Or watch helplessly as their sons run around the bus terminals
They would be able to pay school fees
And pay their rent with money and not their bodies or that of their daughters
They would be able to manage, whether their husbands were dead dead
Or alive but dead
It was such a nice dream
Then Sheba woke up
Alas, it was just a dream
Sheba was in such pain
She thought of how happy the women looked in the dream as they planned
The rare smiles on their faces
Sheba cried when she remembered the hunger, sickness, anger
That was still so real
Yet, Sheba was not prepared to let the dream go
There must have been a reason why she had that dream
She wiped her tears
And took out an old box and searched for the gold chain
The one her Auntie gave her a few years ago
Her Auntie used to tell her, ‘Whenever you give, you never lack’
When Sheba asked her, ‘what if I have nothing to give?’
Her Aunt would say, ‘there is always something to give’
Sheba took the chain to Musa in the market
He cheated her, but what he gave was enough for what Sheba had dreamt about
She called Halima, Ngozi, Lillian and Bukky
She said to them, ‘We need to help ourselves. No one is going to help us. No one is here to save us. We should not be hungry. We should not be sick. Our children should not be hopeless. We should not die before our time. I have a little money. Let us do something productive so that we can all benefit. Let us help each other. We have no one else’
They all started to cry and thank her. She said to them, ‘Whenever you give, you never lack’.
You all know a Halima, Ngozi, Lillian or Bukky
It could be a Hassan, Chike, Paul or Bode
You know, without being told, that they are hungry, sick, sad and angry
Don’t wait for them to come to you
Be a Sheba
Whenever you give
You never lack
There is always something to give
Bisi Adeleye-Fayemi is a Gender Specialist, Policy Advocate and Writer. She is the Founder of Abovewhispers.com, an online community for women. She can be reached at BAF@abovewhispers.com