Knowing what you authentically want and need is essential to building a happy, fulfilling life. But thousands of professionals I’ve worked with over the past 11 years dream they want one thing, when in reality, having that thing would make them miserable.
I teach about the concept of a “calling” vs. a job, and how you can determine for yourself which you really want and which will make you happiest. Personally, I’ve had both. First, I built an 18-year corporate marketing career in publishing and membership services which was, in actuality, a series of progressively more responsible jobs that, for the most part, weren’t a great fit for me but paid well and allowed me the financial freedom to do what I wanted to do in my personal life. Now, however, I feel that the work I do is a calling for me, and I couldn’t stop even if I tried. But this calling has taken a large toll, for sure.
I’ve found that the difference between a job and a calling is vast, but unless you’ve lived the professional identity of both, it’s rather difficult to understand the difference.
Years ago, I read a very thought-provoking article by Michael Lewis, columnist for Bloomberg News, about the difference between a calling and a job. He had some powerful insights. What struck me most were two intriguing concepts:
“There’s a direct relationship between risk and reward. A fantastically rewarding career usually requires you to take fantastic risks.”
and
“A calling is an activity that you find so compelling that you wind up organizing your entire self around it — often to the detriment of your life outside of it.”
I couldn’t agree more with both of these points.
Many people dream of pursuing a fantastic and thrilling calling but simply aren’t willing to commit to the hard, courageous, and risk-intensive work (externally or internally) to do it.
A job, on the other hand, is something that can give you a semblance of “security” and “stability” and can allow you to use your talents in productive ways, giving you the money to do what you want to outside of work. A great job supports you to contribute in meaningful ways to outcomes that matter to you. But it’s not a calling.
A calling chooses you, and grabs you by the collar and takes you for the ride of your life.
One note: I’ve observed that nothing outside yourself is truly “secure” and no job can be either. It’s who you are and what you have inside of you that offers the truest security and stability. I know this because shortly after my boss promised me that I’d have a very long and lucrative career at my employer and encouraged me to buy the biggest house I could afford (which I did), the tragedies of 9/11 occurred and I was laid off one month later.
People say – why can’t I have both at the same time? Why can’t I have a job that feels like a calling? You can’t have both because they’re not the same thing at all. Trying to make a job a calling, or vice versa, will just send you a long detour away from figuring out what will make you happiest based on your authentic values, preferences, style and needs. (Here’s more about your dominant action style and what you need at work.) And you don’t choose a calling – it chooses you, and it can’t be denied.
What is required then, to pursue a calling and be successful at achieving your financial, emotional and other goals in this calling?
Below a list of traits and characteristics that are essential to building and sustaining a fantastically reward career that has as its core a true calling:
You Need:
• A deep and ongoing commitment to making a difference in this direction (this is not about simply wanting it – it’s about committing fiercely to it)
• A wellspring of positive energy, because it takes a lot out of you to pursue a calling
• Frequent and continual leaps of faith and hope, when all signs are against you
• Self-esteem and the confidence in abundance, to continue to know in your heart and soul that your dream is achievable
• Openness and flexibility to pivot and to learn from your mistakes and to get help when needed
• A very healthy dose of reality about what’s necessary to succeed on this path
• Abundant risk-acceptance and tolerance, and the ability to proceed amidst instability
• The belief that you can’t live without pursuing this work
• A very tough skin
• An ability to “power up” (gain strength, skill, confidence, and self-mastery) as you expand, because you’ll need access to internal and external power
• A supportive tribe who will bolster you when times get tough (because they will)
• And finally, very well-formed boundaries that allow you to speak up for yourself and protect yourself from others who would say, “You’re crazy and stupid to do this” or “You don’t have what it takes to succeed at this.”
Neither a job or a calling is better or worse; they’re just different. There are costs and benefits to both. The key to a fulfilling life is to follow your authentic path (not somebody else’s). Figure out what that lights you up on the inside, and motivates you to be all you can be, and go do it.
For either a job or a calling, the critical question is not what your employment can give you, but what natural gifts and talents you can leverage in service of others and the world, in a way that fills your soul and brings you great joy (and reward) while doing it.
So Ask Yourself Today:
1. Am I longing for a job or a calling? Which path will actually work best for me and my life?
2. If I know I have a calling, am I truly ready to do what it takes to pursue it?
3. Where will I get empowering guidance, support, and help to follow my calling successfully so I thrive in the process (rather than be crushed by it)?
4. If it’s a stable job I want, how do I go about building the best job and career that will give me what I want?
For either option – pursuing your calling or crafting a great job – do it consciously, with eyes wide open, powerful commitment and aligned action. Conscious commitment and planful action is the difference between a frustrating, lack-luster work life that fails to satisfy, versus living full out – and expressing your true authentic nature each step of the way.
One Response
This is an encouraging write up. I really hope my calling finds me because in this part of the world, most people will find a way to derive joy in whatever job they find doing. Thanks a bunch.