Hello Readers, you are welcome to a special hangout for young women who are single, well maybe searching but are working hard, developing themselves, having some societal issues cos they are older and still single, no man, just single. In this part of the world, you know what that is. There is some special kind of adults who don’t pry into asking why ‘you haven’t settled down’  Hmmph! that word, ‘settling down’ can be frustrating at times. I get it though, they say the clock of a woman ticks by the day and the earlier she gets married and gets a baby, the better but wait, what if she hasn’t found the man she needs? will she kill herself? Oh well, you are welcome to my hangout… ‘In her 30’s’  This is the place where I share my daily ordeal with y’all on a weekly basis. I try to talk to you cos I feel y’all can relate with me or will be able to relate with me.

You are welcome! Let me formally introduce myself; My name is Miriam. I am an event planner, content editor and a jolly good fellow. I am not married but I am in my 30’s and being the only female in the family, my parents want me to get settled. ‘Money doesn’t solve companionship’ in their words.  And today, I will be gisting about…

“GETTING A DATE”

‘Miriam, you should go out more often, try to mingle, try to talk to people, money isn’t everything, join a dating site, anything can happen you know?’  If you are an older single woman and you haven’t heard any of these words, you are lucky and your peeps are just special. Sometimes, they say these things because they care but most times, they could be bugging. Like, leave me alone. How are you sure that I don’t mingle. Listen, it is kinda hard to find a man with sense nowadays especially in this continent of ours. Some of them feel that they are doing you a favour for asking you out. Some of them get so arrogant on a first date and expect that you never say a word cos, after all, a woman should be courteous and I marvel at the guts of these men. They can be annoying at times. So, one day, after a very pesty moment with my mum, well in her mind, she was advising me. I am not being disrespectful but how do you call comparison a piece of advice? she reminded me of all my friends who were married, some younger, some older, in fact, she said I could give birth to some of them. She said I was being lackadaisical about marriage. I wasn’t serious and she told me to mingle and if I like, I should throw her advice away like shit! I nodded throughout the discussion cos I knew the least I wanted was drama. So, I went back to my house and ruminated a little on what she said and I decided to try and get on a date.

Do I have pending dates? nope. I just told myself that I would allow accessibility.  So, one lucky day, I went to the mall to get some groceries and on my way out, I bumped into a very hot dude. I am not going to fake anything here, after all, I am baring my heart out to y’all. The guy was very good looking, and I felt his handsomeness. This uncle parked behind my car and was doing something outside before going into the mall.

As I approached my car, he came forward and said something, I didn’t hear a thing, I just nodded and laughed cos I was kinda blown away and his voice felt like music to my ears. Very good music.   We talked a little, he moved back for me to drive out and parked in my space but before I drove out, uncle collect my contact and I felt good. You know when you see some type of guy and you expect a hello and you get one, you feel fulfilled with your beauty.  Fast forward, Uncle called me, we started chatting and we decided to go have lunch. Mehn! I have never been that nervous in a while but oh well, I decided to allow me be me all the way. We agreed to meet by 5 pm and I got there by 4:50 pm cos I take my time very seriously. Uncle didn’t get here till 5:30 pm and he didn’t call neither did he send a message to tell me that he would be running late. Hmmm! I sighed. This man isn’t looking like it o. It looks like ‘this is faworaja o’ Issoke. I chilled and prayed he had a good excuse for keeping me waiting. Finally, when he arrived, he smiled and said, oh well… I broke a record. What? what kinda record I asked, ‘women always keep men waiting but I broke that record today’ Oh, Really? Wow. I replied sarcastically. Okay, I am sorry sha. I didn’t really plan to be late but something came up and I hope I didn’t keep you for so long? In my head, I was pissed but I was trying to hide it. For so long? I replied… I got here before 5. Oh wow. I didn’t know you would keep to your time. I keep to my words. I responded back.

I don’t joke with time. I take my time seriously cos I am a serious-minded person.  He got the message and smiled. Oh, I am sorry Miriam, really sorry. Okay, let’s get to eat. What would you like to take? We got food and started talking but in my head, I was angry ehn! I was too angry but just when I was trying to let it go, something happened.  So, where do you work? I asked. I am an entrepreneur. I am a tech guy.  Wow. what are you into then? Programming? front end developer, backend developer or?  He smiled, you know a lot about tech o.  I really don’t know a lot but I have friends and I read too.  Okay, I am not really a programmer programmer, uncle said.  As in, I don’t understand. If you are not a programmer you should be something else, after all, you are a tech guy. He smiled again and said I was prying too much and should enjoy the food. I understand that you may not feel comfortable talking to a stranger about your work but a simple question about what you do for a living shouldn’t be that difficult now?

Okay, I said. What is the name of your company? ‘The spirit man’ Hmmm! I responded and decided not to ask any further. This uncle is very shady. I resolved. Then he asked if I was in a relationship. I told him no. Wow. you are not? no serious relationship? nope. That is good, take your time. I am not in a relationship either cos I am a very busy man and women can be a sort of distraction. Please! who is this man in front of me now? How do you say such to another woman? I said okay and continued eating. We should be good friends you know? I smiled but didn’t reply. In my mind I wanted the day to end. This is definitely a no no. I may have been taken away by his looks but his brain doesn’t correlate with his looks ( O mase o) You don’t want us to be friends?  I smiled, we just met, we might as well, try to see if friendship can work. You are a very brilliant lady, he said. (really, I am flattered) but I don’t think I like it when women want to know too much on a first date. Kapish! I have had enough of this man oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I am tired already. So, I excused myself to the bathroom and from the bathroom, I left. Halfway to my getting home, I called to tell him that something came up and I had to go and guess what he said? ‘So you thought I couldn’t pay for your food?’ Argghhhhh!!!  I ended the call, drove home and went to bed.

‘Miriam, go on a date, go on a date, no be him be this?’ Well, you would say, Miriam, don’t conclude… Okay, I won’t. I am coming back.