According to research, out of 10 African girls, approximately 7.5 of them have been raped, sexually molested, sexually harassed. These girls have either been molested by their closed families, senior friends and some of them by their dads. Women around the world have a history of sexual molestation, this has affected a lot of women’s psychic, given them neurotic symptoms. Rape is not about what the woman is wearing, rape isn’t about why a woman, a girl went to where she went to, it is about the madness of the rapist. A rapist is a rapist and shouldn’t be excused. Recently, lots of women have been saying their truth. they have been opening up what they have kept for a very long time. Okay, look at this scenario, how do you tell your mother that her elder brother, your uncle touched you in your sleep the day he came on a visit to your home?

How do you explain to her that he inserted his penis in your vagina and told you never to mention it? As a ten-year-old or even older girl, how do you handle such? Let’s look at another scenario, how do you handle a situation where the girl opened up to the family and her family members told her to shut up just because  ‘he is family’ and the girl is forced to keep silent, to suffer in silence and told to never speak about it. How about a woman who’s been raped by her religious leader? the one who’s supposed to stand for her in the ‘way of God’ the one who’s supposed to direct her but has taken her dignity by pinning her down and forcing himself on her? How do you handle such? A woman who’s gang-raped by armed robbers on her way from work, how do you tell her to keep cool that the nightmares would end? How? These are countless scenarios but real-life situations of girls who have turned women, and of younger girls whose rights to live freely have been deprived. Girls who were just minding their business but an uncle came in the picture and stole her dignity of her.  I had an opportunity to speak to someone who was raped by a pastor she respected, the man she saw as a mentor. he raped her, threatened her and guess what? this lady couldn’t live with the nightmares, the shame and all that comes with being a victim in our society so she took her life. I still haven’t recovered from the shock!

Listen!

It’s Never A Victim’s Fault 

You see, its no news that we have irrational, stupid thinkers and analogists in our society. I know some people just open their mouths and spit rubbish just because they can and do this shamelessly. How would you ask a girl what she was wearing when she got raped? It is absolutely not about what she’s wearing but the mind of the person who forcefully had his way on her, I mean, why don’t you sit down and have a rethink about this stupid question called ‘what did you wear’ so, a man ‘corners’ a girl, amidst screams and tears, sweats and blood had sex with her and he left fulfilled just because she was wearing what isn’t pleasant to your moral dictionary? Seriously? does that even make sense? Only a mad man would go for a girl and have sex with her without her consent. Only madmen rape women. It is not about what she is wearing it is about the mental state of that man, he is absolutely sick. Okay, what would you say about girls of ages 6-14 who are being raped by their uncles? a four-year-old girl was reportedly raped by one man who’s her uncle, so let me ask you, what was that small girl wearing? or what did she wear that could warrant such an act? Insanity is the cause of rape and the insane one is the rapist.

Never Shame a Victim

The reason why most rape victims keep quiet is because of the stigmatisation, the tongue lashing, the bashing, the trauma that the society would subject them to. A woman is raped and she is blamed for being a victim of rape, a girl is raped and her mother is blamed for being negligent and then you wonder why no one is coming out to speak, they won’t speak because there are pointers supporting the rapist, victims will be told to shut up, keep the family’s name, keep your dignity, no man would marry a man who would marry a woman who’s has been raped, so keep quiet. The victim is silenced by everything she sees, she is subjected to keeping mute by force and there you see women suffering in silence, women groaning on the inside. Women who are struggling to live cos while they lived, someone came and stole them away. If we want this menace to stop, we must stand up for victims, we must encourage them to speak and fight for them by enforcing laws that would make rapist be punished. I personally would want rapists to face life imprisonment with their penis cut off. That way, we would pass a strong message to every man out there that consent is key. If she doesn’t give her consent, desist!

Let The Rapist Be Punished Not Sorry

Enough of the ‘I am sorry, it is the act of the devil statements’. Enough of the ‘I won’t do that again’, ‘I don’t know what came over me’ statement. Any man who rapes a woman, any man who molests a girl, any man who harasses a girl must be punished by law. That man must be made to face the music. That man should be jailed. It is not enough that he is sorry, let him be sorry in jail. Let there be laws that would protect the girl child and allow offenders to go to jail. That way, there will be a strong signal that makes men tread carefully. You cannot be sorry for what you did intentionally, you cannot be sorry when you held your victim pinned down and dived your penis into her amidst sweat, tears and pleas. No! Face the music, go to jail and be sorry there!

Ladies and gentlemen, listen to your kids, pay attention to them. Don’t silent the victims, don’t be an enabler.  I would also implore our government to aid the judiciary on laws that would help women and girls, laws that would help women to fight against rapists, laws that would take rapists down to jail. These are the kinds of laws we want to be implemented and please make the country, the society a safe haven for our women and girls. That’s what we want.