It’s possible you might be wondering how a relationship can be loveless but I’m sure you’re aware that it’s not just love that holds a relationship. A fact is this; we don’t go into a relationship because we only love, if that was the case then, we would have dated or probably married everyone we loved. A lot of people are out there struggling with their relationship, struggling I mean, they probably don’t love each other like before and the relationship is gradually becoming loveless. Being loveless doesn’t mean that the relationship is completely out of love but it means that it’s not as it used to be. I’ll love that we read through to the end.

I saw something recently about a lady that said she’s falling out of love for her partner but she doesn’t want to leave the relationship. Why do you think something like that is happening? We all have things we saw in our partners that made us eventually decided to be with them and also want to build a future with them. Now, when these qualities start diminishing, we might start feeling less for them. An example is this, you’re with a lady that loves outings, someone that loves adventurous situations and you knew that’s her kind of person. You put up with the act of taking her out and creating different experiences with her and now, you’re married and you now feel like those experiences are no longer necessary. Some even go as far as saying that ‘’oruka ti dowo na’’ meaning you have put a ring on her finger so she can’t go anywhere. My brother, if you can’t keep up with something, don’t even initiate it. Over time, the love will fade away and you both will end up living together as housemates. You’ll like that right?

What happened to understanding your partners love language; acts of service, receiving gifts, words of affirmation, physical touch, and spending quality time. If up until now, you don’t know or you’ve not found out your partners love language, please do and start expressing love. Love is not a one-way street, it’s two-way traffic. If it’s only one person that keeps putting in all the efforts, one day, the relationship will crash. Like, how do you even explain not communicating with your partner for 24hrs without feeling any guilt? Maybe it’s high time you both had a conversation. Whenever you feel like you’re falling out of love for your partner, speak up, talk about it, trash things out and it will get better. Ask questions like:

‘’What am I doing wrong?’’

‘’What am I not doing right?’’

‘’What should I do better?’’

These efforts would make your partner feel loved and he or she will be left with no choice than to reciprocate.

Lastly and most importantly, think about those things you guys did when the fire of love was still burning and start doing them again. It could be the way you called, it could be those lovely messages, it could be anything. You both need to think about it and work things out. Love is sweet with the right person but it requires a process of working it out effortlessly. Do not forget that. Make amends in your relationships, call your partners randomly to appreciate them, send them love messages as though you just want to ask them out and watch magic happen in the relationship.