People often say they want to work on their relationship, but most people don’t realize how much work and effort it actually takes to do that. The good news is there are many, many ways you can build and maintain a great relationship, and there really is no “right” or “wrong” way.

While there are many qualities that can make up strong and healthy relationships, I’ve condensed that list to the few you need to master first. Here are the five vowels of building a successful relationship:

A: Affection

Showing your partner affection, giving them the attention they need, is crucial.

There are so many ways to show affection: holding your partner’s hand, sitting close to each other while watching TV, showing them love randomly or unexpectedly. Building that connection and showing your partner that you care for them is a requirement. Don’t fall behind on this one.

E: Empathy

Empathy is a quality that has many characteristics. And it is a quality that can be learned—one that can help deepen the connection in your relationship.

You have to genuinely be interested in how your partner feels and understand the way they see certain things. Not showing empathy in your relationship will cause your partner to question whether you really care or not. You can start showing empathy by listening and interacting from a genuine standpoint, by offering to help in their time of need, or just by opening up to them. Finding the emotional connection is important to being empathetic in your relationship.

I: Integrity

Having integrity in general is a very honorable quality, but having integrity in your relationship is just as important. Having integrity helps open you up to your vulnerabilities, which in turn helps build a strong relationship.